Slow Progress & The What-Ifs

Building something usually takes quite a bit longer than we think. Progress is slow. Tedious. But somehow we need to stay devoted to the process. The monotony and the daily toil is the path. There are no shortcuts. And even if you are dedicated, sometimes you move backwards. Not only does progress take a lot longer than we’d like. But the path is never linear.

We wind our way across peaks and valleys. Through dense forests with barely visible winding trails. In those sections we move slowly, calculating our steps one at a time and often having to double back. Constantly searching for any way forward. Through those sections, if we stop to worry which way is the best way, we’ll never get anywhere. So we test one way, then another.

Sometimes we get to run down a flat fire road, our path and next destination in clear view from miles away. Those are the times we gain our confidence. When we get to the parts of the path that feel easy, we might even trick ourselves into thinking the rest of the way will be smooth and comfortable. Chances are that it won’t be. But the optimism we find when things are easy helps to give us hope.

Up ahead there are usually more obstacles. Maybe the flat trail rounds a curve and suddenly we’re facing a hundred-foot rock wall. Or it could be a more gradual shift. A smooth path that slowly becomes rockier and harder to navigate. Maybe the terrain stays conquerable, but we run out of steam. It doesn’t matter why. The result is still the same. After moving so quickly for a while, we find ourselves only inching along.

So, what do we do next? 

The thing is, we pretty much always have the option to tap out. We can just stop. Give up. Find a new dream. Even on the simplest or toughest things, no one is forcing us to keep going. Except ourselves, and the hope and confidence we’ve been building with time. Other people might be invested in our progress. But there is not a single other person out there that can make any of us take even one more step. Only we can do it for ourselves.

It’s a pretty crazy concept. Especially when you stop and really let it sink in. But it’s true. It’s why so many people like to talk about the what-ifs of their college days well into their retired years, and why we all know that you cannot help someone who doesn’t want to accept help. Every next step we take is ours. And it’s ours alone.

Giving up usually requires less energy. Who knows if that makes it the easier or harder thing. But the best time to ask the what-ifs is when we’re contemplating quitting. What if we had kept going long enough to find out what was possible? What if we discovered what we’re actually capable of instead of only wondering? There is always a point when we can know with certainty one of two things: That we’ve discovered what was possible, or that we no longer need to find out.

There will always be hurdles and obstacles in our many paths. And there will always be people who refill our water bottles and bring us a headlamp for the dark places, willing to go on each journey with us. But only we can decide to keep going, no matter how slow we’re moving.